Mindful Meditation Journey


As I dive into the last stages of She Wolfe, before she goes to print next month, I've taken it upon myself to 'up' my meditation practice in order to further refine my thoughts and self-communication. 

Lately, and on occasion, I feel a little lazy when it comes to my spiritual practices. I'm sure this happens to all of us. I grow frustrated with myself when I fall off the wagon, because I truly want to push the limits of my own mind and soul in ways that are beneficial for me, and everyone around me. 

Recently I came across Mindfulness Meditation and I resonated with its principles. I enjoy very much the idea of simply sitting with your mental processes with the intention of non-judgement. In my earlier meditation practices, I tried for this as well, but there was always another intention (especially in Buddhist meditation) which was to eventually clear the mind. For me, I feel that the mental clearing will happen naturally as I choose not to hold onto the thoughts that race through my head. The less I care about them, the less of them I will have. Or so I imagine.

So this will be a little meditation journal of sorts - feel free to follow along! 

Friday, October 6th

Two words came to mind during today's first re-entry session. "Observe" and "retrain." 

It's amazing how easily we get caught up in our own thought processes. I mean, why wouldn't we? We are not taught to do anything differently. But when you spend even a moment deciding to simply observe the processes simply as they are, without idly and unconsciously attaching to them, there is an immediate relief and sense of freedom. 

Each time I found myself attaching to the thoughts that arose, I would gently non-verbally say, or think, "observe" and I would be afforded, again, this slightly more 'birds eye view' of my own inner chatter, instead of being right on that train barreling through the tunnels of my mind.

About halfway through the meditation, the word "retrain" came through like a thunderclap. So much of what we think about the mind (and more specifically - ourselves, our identity) feels automatic, already written, set in stone. Especially as we age, it seems like we just 'are who we are.' The word "retrain" is empowering for those whose character is excited by the push towards becoming a warrior. Those who relish in the challenge of undoing what is useless, and strengthening what is necessary. In that moment, I found it empowering. And I understood its trajectory, and how it needed to address me. 

My mental map is vast, as is yours. A lot of it is quite amazing, but a lot of it isn't. I'm looking forward to cutting a path right through to the heart of myself in a new way, through non-judgement and quiet observation. 

More soon. 

xx D 

Devany WolfeComment